


Every Path You Take Will Always Lead You Home

by easilydistractedbyfanfic



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Cussing, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Family Feels, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Found Family, Friends to Lovers, Minor/Background Relationships - Freeform, S5 Canon Divergence, Spacekru Family Dynamics, What If for s5, just let them all be happy, shallow valley
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-23
Updated: 2020-06-23
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:54:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24878782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/easilydistractedbyfanfic/pseuds/easilydistractedbyfanfic
Summary: What if the Eligius IV didn't come back to Earth, and Raven found a way to get Spacekru off the Ring on her own?Based on a prompt via t100 Writers for BLMThey chat as the water boils, catching up on some of the news about the people from the village. There’s a few other women pregnant, and Harper is excited that her baby will have some other young children around to eventually play with. It isn’t until the tea has cooled enough to sip that Harper looks expectantly at her and her curiosity gives way.“So? What’s going on with you and Murphy living together?”“What do you mean?”“Come on, Raven. You know what I mean.”“Okay, he’s sleeping here, if that’s what you’re getting at.”Harper sighs dramatically. “Well, why is he sleeping here? Are you guys hooking up or something?”
Relationships: John Murphy/Raven Reyes
Comments: 24
Kudos: 131
Collections: The t100 Writers for BLM Initiative





	Every Path You Take Will Always Lead You Home

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Beesreadbooks](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beesreadbooks/gifts).



> There's a fantastic fandom initiative going on called Bellarke Writers for BLM, and you can find their blog on tumblr @bellarkefic-for-blm to read more about it & what the guidelines are. I signed up to participate as a writer, and as you can see, not all the stories will be for Bellarke! I received a prompt from a wonderful reader who is kind enough to support & encourage my writing, and I hope very much that Beesreadbooks enjoys the story I wrote just for her!
> 
> Prompt - A season 5 AU where the Eligius ship does not return to earth and Raven finds a way back to earth and they settle in Eden with everyone else. Fluff/maybe some emotional angst
> 
> Much appreciation and a special shout-out to @silvernyxa on tumblr for the gorgeous drawing to accompany this fic, also created in support of BLM! It's such a great scene and I love it! Please check out their tumblr for more awesome t100 art!
> 
> PS - this fic hits & pushes me over the 500k words published on ao3 mark!

* * *

[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/170152452@N02/50051803196/in/dateposted-public/)

* * *

It’s been almost seven months since they returned to Earth, since she had finally figured out a way to fuel and land the rocket without killing herself and the other six members of her family in the process. But despite each day since then passing relatively peacefully, sometimes Raven Reyes still can’t believe she’s really living back on solid ground. 

They aimed for the spot of green, and they found so much more than what they expected. Clarke was alive, for one thing, and if that wasn’t hard enough to wrap her mind around, she had a young girl with her. It had been the nicest kind of reunion, a complete surprise, but they hadn’t gotten to celebrate for long. Clarke had solemnly explained that she hadn’t been able to get the bunker in Polis open, the entrance too deeply buried under heavy rubble. 

After Clarke shared the news and their small gathering had sobered and gone quiet, Raven had broken the silence with laughter, explaining to everyone once she caught her breath that finding a way to remove a bunch of dust and broken building pieces seemed a lot easier than inventing a new fuel system and avoiding burn-up on reentry to Earth’s atmosphere, so she was sure she could come up with a solid plan. Luckily, Clarke had retrieved the Rover years before and gotten it into drivable condition for herself and Madi, and with the tools and supplies Raven had crammed into the rocket from the Ring, she was able to get the winch system up and running again too. It took time, and a lot of effort, but after five months of daily work and sweat, they’d managed to free the people left alive within the bunker. 

Now she can hear the muted cacophony of Shallow Valley behind her as she walks through the woods, looking for a little quiet. The addition of hundreds more people around them all is such a change from their life on the Ring - a good change, but often overwhelming at times too. Every few days she needs to get away, has to find somewhere to go where she can just think without constant questions and demands for her expertise or abilities. Today she’s headed away from the boisterous lake and towards the calm of a small stream that flows into it, hoping she might get even an hour to herself before someone comes to look for her. 

The sound of the bubbling water is relaxing, and even though it’s cold on her fingers she takes her boots and socks off, rolling up her pants and removing her brace so she can dunk her feet in as she lays back on the grass, staring up into the leaf canopy above her head. Yeah, this is what she was looking for. Maybe she’ll close her eyes for just a few minutes while she’s at it. 

A loud shout startles her awake sometime later, and she squints her eyes open, disoriented although she recognizes the voice. 

“Hey! Don’t touch her!”

There’s a man crouched over her, his hand much too close to her face, and Raven pushes herself backwards on her elbows to get out of his reach. He’s from Wonkru, and she’s not sure of his name, but she’s caught his eyes on her before. She doesn’t know what his intentions are but she doesn’t like waking up with him looming over her. Not at all. 

He’s not the one who yelled though. No, that was Murphy’s voice, and a second later he appears from the trees off to her left, an irate scowl on his face as he strides over and stands between her and the stranger. 

“What are you doing?” Raven spits the question at the stranger from behind Murphy’s knees, stealthily feeling along the grass behind her for her brace. She’s not going to be able to get up until she puts it back on. 

“Just being friendly,” the man answers as he finally takes a few steps away from her. 

“She doesn’t need any friends,” Murphy sneers, and the man looks like he’s about to speak but then seems to think better of it, shrugging and heading back into the forest. 

“What a fucking creep,” Murphy mutters, turning around to look at her while she hooks the latches on her brace and starts to put her socks back on. “You okay?”

“Yeah, but I'm not even sure what just happened.”

“Long version or short version?” He grins, and she knows well enough to _always_ ask for the long version when Murphy’s involved, otherwise crucial bits of information are often left out. 

She doesn’t bother to answer him though, just gives him an expectant look as she pulls on her shoes. 

“Fine. Don’t tell anyone, but I’ve got a hammock and some supplies up high in a stand of trees over there. There’s pretty good sightlines even with the leaf cover. I saw you come out here and take your boots off and I figured you wanted some alone time. But I don’t know, maybe twenty, thirty minutes after you fell asleep that guy came around. Seemed like he might have been looking for you from the way he approached, and when I saw him squat down next to you like that, I didn’t think it was for anything good so I yelled and came over. Do you know him?”

“No, not really. I’ve seen him around, caught him watching me a few times, maybe. We’ve never spoken.”

“Looks like someone might have a little crush,” he smirks, but he holds out his hand while he says it to help her to her feet. 

“Whatever,” Raven dismisses, although the encounter does have her feeling disturbed. 

“Seriously, Raven. You don’t even have a knife on you. You shouldn’t be walking around anywhere without one. Falling asleep without your brace and not having somebody to watch your back isn’t a good idea either.”

He actually sounds concerned, and maybe disappointed in her along with it. She looks over at him since he’s starting to walk alongside her, and she assumes he’s going to accompany her back to camp rather than return to whatever hideout he’s made for himself. The fact that she’s not protesting the gesture probably means he thinks she agrees with him, and a part of her genuinely does as she remembers the chilling sensation of seeing a stranger so close to her while she was sleeping. Maybe the guy didn’t have bad intentions, but even so, she wouldn’t have been able to get away without her brace and it wasn’t something she had even considered. She offers up a token resistance anyway, annoyed that Murphy makes a better point than she does. 

“There hasn’t been any problems, no violence since people are so glad to be out of the bunker and focused on getting shelters made before winter hits.”

“Doesn’t matter. You and I both know it’s only a matter of time before things could implode. Right now everybody’s on their best behavior, knowing they’ve got to get along if they want food and housing through the winter. And that’s fine - I’ll take it, too. But there could be a lot of us-against-them scenarios if push comes to shove.”

He’s not wrong, though it’s something she’s tried not to think about too deeply as they all settle in. She sighs, unhappy that her pleasant afternoon plans went up in smoke and turned into something potentially alarming, and they finish the rest of the walk back to camp without saying a word. 

It isn’t until they reach the door of her cabin-turned-workshop that Murphy breaks the silence. He leans down and slides something out of his boot, offering it to her. 

“Here. Just keep this on you, alright?”

The knife is short but deadly, polished and sharp when she pulls it out of the leather sheath. 

“Murphy, where did you get this?” They’re not supposed to have weapons in camp; that’s one of the rules the leadership council came up with. 

His mouth twists in a familiar smirk. “I have my ways.”

She opens her mouth to chastise him, but he holds up a hand and waves her off. 

“Don’t argue, Reyes. I can get another one. And you know I’m right.” 

He doesn’t bother to offer a goodbye, just turns and starts back in the direction he came from. She should probably go after him, give him a lecture about how he’s not above the rules. Looking down at the knife in her palm though, the weight of it is reassuring. It would fit nicely along the inside of her brace. 

Shaking her head at her own rule-breaking, she heads into her cabin, realizing that she hadn’t even gotten a chance to ask Murphy why he’s setting up some kind of refuge out in the woods. 

* * *

Raven cleans up the mess on her workbench, anxious to join her friends for a few rounds of moonshine out at what they’ve started calling the town bar. It’s not much more than a three-sided shack with a roof, but there’s tables and benches and a big fire pit, and a few of the builders made some shelves and a bar to hold the equipment. Everyone’s been working so hard prepping for winter that it feels like she’s hardly seen anyone but Monty and Emori lately since they often work together or at least coordinate the projects they have leadership over, so she’s looking forward to the gathering. 

She glances around her cabin, checking to see if she’s forgotten anything. Most of the buildings in Shallow Valley went to families first, and then couples. But a medical building for Abby and a workshop for Raven had been prioritized too, so she’d gotten lucky and her cabin was large enough for her to work and sleep in. Not by much, considering the big bed that had once been in the main room had been removed to make way for the large work table she needed, but there’s a small alcove along the side with a couple cots, and she’s definitely had worse. People are in and out during the day, but at night it’s all hers. She feeds another couple of logs into the fireplace, not wanting the large room to chill in the time that she’s outside, and then she pulls on her jacket and shuts the door behind her. 

If everyone’s records are correct, it’s October now, and Shallow Valley is definitely getting colder, especially in the evening. Pushing her hands deep into the pockets of her jacket, she realizes she’s going to need to make a new trade soon, finding someone who can make her some mittens in exchange for whatever she can repair for them. She hasn’t been trading at all lately, going without the things on her own list because there are so many large-scale projects that need doing. But the mittens are going to need to take priority if tonight’s weather is anything to go by. 

They don’t have a lot, but some of the Wonkru members smuggled in or created instruments during their time in the bunker, so she can hear the rhythmic beats before she gets within sight of the bar, set far away from the houses to protect against the noise. There’s a huge fire blazing, and lots of torches set up, and it strikes her as a pretty scene as she approaches. She’s barely within sight before Echo runs over, wrapping her arms around her in a big bear hug. 

“I haven’t seen you in too long! Hurry up and drink to catch up with me!”

Raven laughs at Echo’s antics, already feeling like her responsibilities are melting away in the face of some fun. It’s going to be a good night. 

* * *

She’s lost track of how many drinks she’s had, but it’s not as strong as Monty’s algae moonshine on the Ring, so Raven isn’t too concerned. Some of the people from the Wonkru bunker have been making batches lately with some kind of grass they’ve found, and although it’s not as bitter as Monty’s concoction, she finds herself missing it a little as her gaze wanders around at all the people enjoying the party atmosphere. 

Clarke took Madi back to their house for bed a while ago but hasn’t returned yet, and Echo and Murphy are having some kind of fierce conversation across the table. It’s probably best if she doesn’t ask any questions about that. Next to her, Emori, Harper and Monty are talking about the output of the Polis hydroponics farm, but she doesn’t really want to talk about anything serious tonight so she stays out of that too. Bellamy is over at the bar with Miller, getting a refill on his drink, and as he makes his way back to the table and pulls out a bench, she spots Harper and Monty sharing an intense look before Monty nods and smiles. 

“Hey, guys. Harper and I have something to say. We were hoping to tell everyone at once, but maybe it’s fitting that only the seven of us are here right now. You guys probably deserve to know first anyway.” He glances over at Harper, who has a huge smile on her face. “We’re pregnant!”

At first there’s an astonished silence at the table, and Raven wouldn’t admit it out loud, but her first thought is less celebratory and more shock that their implants aren’t fail-safe, but she hurries to cover her surprise, taking a quick sip of her drink so she can think of something to say. 

Echo is the first to congratulate them and then everyone else joins in, Murphy making a sly comment to Monty before slapping him on the back, and Emori giving Harper a hug. Bellamy looks a bit stunned but is quick to turn it into a grin, and Monty and Harper are so happy it’s a wonder the rest of them didn’t figure it out sooner. 

Raven lifts up her cup and looks around at the people she will always consider her family, feeling the beginnings of tears as her emotions swell. “I can’t think of two people who are better suited to be parents. And thank goodness because the rest of us are sure to be bad influences! This is going to be one lucky kid. Congratulations!”

Everyone drinks to the sentiment, and Harper confesses that her cup has only held water for a while now, and she was worried that one of them would notice before they shared the news. After that the night is focused on the soon-to-be-parents, as it should be. 

* * *

It’s late by the time Raven starts making her way back to her cabin, and she’s feeling the effects of the moonshine more than she expected along with the shivery air. Her path is more curvy than straight when she leaves the bar, although plenty of people are still going strong. She looks over her shoulder a few times, the sensation of someone watching her sending warning signs to her brain, but she sees no one around. It’s quieter here, most of the families long since asleep, and for the first time she wishes she wasn’t going home alone or back to an empty house. 

In spite of her initial reaction to Harper and Monty’s news, she really is thrilled for them. Anyone can see how much they want this baby. It shakes her a little though, that two of her closest friends have progressed to this stage of life while she feels nowhere near it. Her entire existence has been so focused for years - first with making sure they could survive on the Ring and then with getting them back safely to Earth. And then once they got here, she was busy figuring out ways to open the bunker and maximize food output for the population increase. And now everyone looks to her for the things they want, including irrigation and running water and if any of the technology she salvaged from the Ring can be repaired and how it can be used. 

Two of her closest friends are going to have a baby, and meanwhile she’s still vaguely surprised she’s survived this long. Kind of a tough thing to wrap her mind around, though she continues to try as she enters her cabin, dumping her shoes and coat at the door. It’s still warm inside but there’s mostly embers in the fireplace now. On autopilot, she walks over to the alcove with the two narrow cots and takes off her clothes, putting on something to sleep in. The urge is powerful to climb under the covers, but she knows if she doesn’t grab at least a few more pieces of wood from the bin by the back door, she’s going to regret it in a few hours when the heat is gone. She should have done that before she got undressed, but her thoughts are scattered and she’s tired. And drunk, definitely drunk. 

Maybe that’s why it seems appropriate instead of unusual that Murphy is sitting on top of her wood bin when she opens her back door. 

“You following me home now or what?” 

It may be dark out, but there’s no missing Murphy’s eye roll. “I left the bar earlier than you, Raven. Remember?”

“Fine. I guess you have a point. Get up and let me get some wood before I freeze out here.”

He heaves a long-suffering sigh, eyes flicking over her to see she’s only wearing her pajamas. “I got it. Go back in - I need to talk to you about something and you’re not exactly dressed to do this anyway.”

She nods, only partially shutting the door behind her so he can kick it open with his boot when he brings in the logs. There’s a small table and chair set in one corner of the cabin where she keeps her water, dishes and a small stash of food, but it’s late and if Murphy wants to talk to her then he can do it while she’s comfortable. Pulling her brace off and gently dropping it to the floor, she gives in to the impulse to climb under the covers on her cot, fighting to keep her eyes open as she listens to the sounds of Murphy building the fire back up. 

“Reyes. Hey, pay attention.” 

The sound of Murphy’s voice is close, demanding, and then his fingers tug down the blanket that she’s pulled over her head. 

“Nooo, tired,” she complains, the room spinning a little as she opens her eyes and tries to focus. 

“Tired and also hammered, from the look of it. I think you took the celebrating a little too far.” 

“Yeahhhh.”

He sighs and pulls the blanket up again, apparently giving in as he tucks it around the curve of her shoulder. “Raven, that strange Wonkru guy from last week was hanging around your cabin when I left the bar. I don’t know if you’ve been carrying that knife I gave you and you’re drunk. I’m gonna sleep here tonight, okay?”

“Mmm-hmm, night Murphy.” She’s asleep as soon as she gets the words out. 

* * *

Raven wakes up to a gentle but determined shake of her shoulder. Murphy’s sitting on the edge of the cot across from her, his knees bumping her mattress in the narrow space as he leans toward her. 

“Oh, god,” she moans, her mouth dry and her head aching. 

His lips spread into a grin at her wretched state, but he offers her a cup of water from a spot on the floor. “Here. You’re gonna need this.”

She struggles to a sitting position, the blankets falling to her lap as she takes a long sip. “I didn’t think that moonshine was affecting me much when I drank it, but damn. I feel it now.”

“They’ve been making that stuff for how long, and you’re just finding this out?”

“Not all of us get to spend their days off gallivanting in the woods drinking and exploring to our heart’s content, you know.” She softens the accusation with a grin but it only turns into a wince as she bends down to pick up her brace and strap it on. 

“Big brain, big responsibilities,” Murphy shoots back, and even in her rough state, she knows he’s taking it easy on her. “Do you remember anything I said last night?”

“You built up the fire,” she replies, glancing over at the dancing flames. The cabin is warm and comfortable, so he must have added logs earlier this morning too. 

“I was walking back this way when I left the bar, headed for the woods, and I saw that guy from the stream last week. He was looking in your side window.” Murphy points to his left. “He disappeared when I got closer and that’s why I waited for you out back. I wanted to make sure you knew about it. But then you showed up, obviously drunk. So I stayed.”

“I appreciate it. I saw him at the bar last night but he didn’t say anything to me. I do remember feeling like maybe someone was watching me while I walked home but I didn’t see anyone.”

“You keeping that knife on you? Where was it last night?”

Raven pats the side of her brace. “It’s in here.”

“Won’t do you much good if someone sneaks in here while you’re sleeping. You should put it under your pillow each night. I know Echo taught you some stuff but if you’re at a big weight disadvantage, you’re going to want a weapon.”

He’s right, about all of it. But telling him so will only make him gloat, so she redirects instead. “We don’t know he’s up to no good. Maybe he just wants a date or something.”

It’s not that far-fetched. She’s been dealing with being hit on by various men from Wonkru since the first week they got the bunker open. And she’s been shutting them all down since then too. 

“Could be,” Murphy shrugs, but his eyes seem different than they were a few moments before, and she isn’t sure why that bothers her. Maybe he’s thinking about Emori. Their last break up on the Ring stuck, and they haven’t been together going on a year and a half. She’s seen Emori talking to more people lately, and has wondered if her friend has had any romances brewing. 

“Anyway, I’m not planning on getting that drunk again anytime soon. So you don’t need to worry. I can handle myself.”

Murphy grunts in a way that sounds suspiciously skeptical, but he gets to his feet like he’s done with the conversation. 

“Hey. Before you go. You said you saw that guy here on your way to the woods. But the tents for the single men and women are closer to the bar than they are here. Why were you going to the woods so late last night?”

She’s being nosy and he’ll probably brush her off. But even though she sees him chopping wood sometimes, and knows that he’s gone on some of the exploration hunts for food sources, she really doesn’t know what Murphy tends to do with his time. And she wants to make sure he’s not isolating himself like he did for so long on the Ring. 

He surprises her with an answer. “I told you before, I’ve got a hammock and some supplies out by the stream. It’s no big deal.”

“Wait. You’re not _sleeping_ out there, are you, Murphy?” Her tone is incredulous at the mere possibility of it. 

“It’s not a big deal, Reyes. Just drop it.”

She struggles to her feet, cutting him off before he can reach her front door. “No. It _is_ a big deal. You can’t sleep out there. It’s getting colder, and soon it’ll be freezing. They’re making decent progress on more huts and cabins, and Bellamy said that they hope to have everybody out of the tents by early December. But even they provide more protection from the weather than sleeping in a damned tree!”

“Tried that already. I’m not staying there.” The words are hard, final. 

She wants to argue, licks her lips to start doing exactly that because it sounds like the same attitude he’d give her up in space when she would plead with him to come back to the inhabited side of the living quarters with the rest of them. But then sudden understanding hits her like a punch to the gut, and she snaps her mouth shut, realizing exactly why he’s so stubborn about it. 

“I couldn’t sleep with them all around either,” she says instead. “When we hadn’t sorted everything out yet and this cabin wasn’t mine. I remembered some of them, recognized some of their faces even though it was years ago.” She looks up at Murphy, wondering if he knows what she’s getting at. His expression is closed-off, distant. 

Lifting the hem of her shirt slightly, she reveals the scar slashed across the skin of her stomach. It’s faded now, but still visible. She can feel the weight of his gaze as he takes in the marks. 

“There’s still people alive in Wonkru who were there in the Trikru camp when I got accused of poisoning Lexa and sliced open for it. I know exactly who made this cut. And the other scars too. It’s one thing to put it in the past, but it’s another thing to forget. I get why you don’t want to sleep there.”

He takes a deep breath, and she can see his shoulders lose some of their tension. “Yeah. Not that easy to sleep when you don’t trust that you’ll wake up again.”

She smooths down her shirt, feeling her own stress reduce since he’s opening up instead of shutting her out. “I should have asked you already, but I’ve been so busy I wasn’t thinking. You can see that where I sleep is tiny - I think the little bump out where the cots are was an addition for children, like maybe a family lived here once. It’s really too small of a space for a roommate, which is why they didn’t give me one when they gave me this place to use. I did ask Emori, before. She said she wanted to sleep in the single tents though, that we should make an effort to mingle and get along.”

Murphy laughs self-deprecatingly. “I don’t have that do-good gene.”

He’s wrong about that. She knows it from experience. But one persuasive argument at a time. 

“You were right about the knife,” she acknowledges, looking him deep in the eyes so he knows she’s being serious, “and that I need to be more careful. But _I’m_ right about this. You can’t keep sleeping outside all winter. So until you come up with something better, consider this your new home. It’ll be a tight fit but we managed not to kill each other on the Ring, so I think we can make this work. There’s only a few rules - you help keep the fire going, you clean up any mess you make, and don’t move any of my work projects. Think you can manage that?”

He’s silent for long enough that she believes it wasn’t enough effort on her part, that she’ll have to press harder to get him to bend to her will. He’s never easy, but then, neither is she. 

“Guess you’ll find out,” he grumbles, finally breaking their stand-off when his stare skids away from her, but she’s pleased she’s convinced him without a bigger fight so she just rolls her eyes and nudges his shoulder as she pushes past him, heading back to her cot. The door shuts tightly on his way out and she smiles, pulling the scratchy blanket up to her chin. Learning how to navigate John Murphy took a lot of practice, but whenever she wins, the victory always feels especially sweet. 

* * *

Raven’s inside for most of the day after Murphy leaves, mainly because it’s cold and she wants to stay warm. There’s still plenty to do, and she spends her time taking apart some of the electronics from the Ring that she jam-packed into the Vesta before they came back down to Earth. Some of it she ear-marks for current projects and the rest gets put into boxes on the shelves that line one wall of her cabin. No doubt there will be a use for everything at some point, and she’ll end up wishing she was able to grab more when she had the chance. 

Echo comes by to join her for some dinner, and they find a spot at one of the outdoor tables close to the fire even though there’s a lot of people milling about. It’s cold even with the heat of the flames, and Raven’s beginning to be convinced that if this weather continues, she’ll probably be eating inside a lot more. Harper sits down with them soon after, but any chance of conversation ends abruptly when Harper spots the meat on Echo’s plate and stumbles to her feet, only just making it behind a bush before she gets sick. Raven rubs her back and then walks with Harper to her cabin to lie down after, and by the time she returns to her own dinner, half of it is missing. She glares at Echo accusingly, but the other woman just shrugs, saying she couldn’t help herself. There’s no such thing as second helpings in Shallow Valley though, not when those in charge of the food supplies are carefully rationing them to get through the winter, so Raven just groans and decides to get back at Echo another day. It’s not like being hungry isn’t something she’s familiar with. 

The fire in her own cabin is low again when she rushes through the door, anxious to warm up after taking a detour into the trees to relieve herself but getting thoroughly chilled in the process. Annoyed, she isn’t paying enough attention to what she’s doing and ends up getting her fingers smashed between two logs when she’s trying to lift them out of the wood bin out back, the curse words flying fiercely after she finally gets a grip on it and bangs the door open to go inside. 

“Somebody’s grumpy,” Murphy points out from his spot near her kitchen area. He’s seated in one of the chairs, unlacing his boots. His gloves are on the table and his coat is hung on one of the hooks by the door, and she assumes he must’ve come in right after her. 

“My evening sucks,” Raven retorts. “I just crushed my fingers in the stupid wood bin and Echo ate half my dinner after I watched Harper puke her guts up. And I do not remember it being this damned cold when we were here before! I hate it and everyone is saying it’s only going to get worse.”

She loads the wood into the fireplace, being more careful this time, and once it’s done she takes her own coat off, hanging it next to Murphy’s. Pulling out the chair across from him, she sinks down onto it and begins to untie her own boots. Her voice is muffled as she speaks down towards the floor in her hunched over position. 

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad we’re not still up there. But once I fixed the controls, the Ring was always a regular temperature in the areas we lived in most. I wish that could be said about the weather here.”

“Outta luck on that one. But there might be something else I can help you with.”

She looks up at the cryptic words, only to see Murphy pulling a small bundle out of his pants pocket. He tosses it towards her and it lands on the table with a dull thump. 

Unwrapping the edges of the fabric, she’s surprised to find a hefty pile of black walnuts inside. “Where did you get these?” She’s eaten them before, during their first stay on the surface, but as far as she knows, no one has found any since coming back. Except Murphy, apparently. 

“Around. Believe it or not, I do actually _do_ some things in the woods all day,” he says, heavy on the sarcasm. “And I am not going back to algae no matter how desperate things get this winter. I’ve got some things stashed, and if you keep it to yourself maybe I won’t let you starve when things get bad.”

“Oh, please.” Raven scoffs as she chews a mouthful and gets up to drop her boots by the door. “Like you’d let any of us starve. Pretend all you want, I know you _care_.” She grins at him as she walks back to the table and grabs another handful of walnuts before heading over to the alcove where the cots are, reaching up to yank the fabric curtain across the opening. “I’m getting changed for bed. You can change out there. Make sure you blow out the candle on my work table too.”

“Always so bossy,” he quips, but she has no doubt he’ll follow instructions. Probably he’ll grab more wood too. Murphy might act like he doesn’t want to help anyone but himself, but when everything was stacked against them, you could count on him to always come through. 

* * *

They settle into a routine over the next two weeks, Murphy disappearing to do whatever it is he does after they wake up, but he always sets up the fireplace for her before he leaves. There’s really not much to get used to when it comes to being roommates with him, other than sleeping in such a confined space each night, and she’d emptied out the chest that was at the foot of his cot so he could put his meager belongings in it. They weren’t exactly sleeping two feet from each other on the Ring, but they’d gotten plenty of experience being in close quarters and putting up with each other, so the only thing she feels has really changed is that he’s the first person she sees each morning, and the last person she sees before bed. 

Neither of them is hiding their new arrangement from anyone, so it seems strange when Harper brings it up after coming in one afternoon, bundled up tightly against the cold. 

“Hey,” Harper says, “thank god it’s warm in here! Can you take a break? I’ve got some kind of leaves that a woman from Wonkru gave me, saying it makes a nice tea.”

“That sounds good, yeah. Let me just get a pot for the fire and some cups.”

They chat as the water boils, catching up on some of the news about the people from the village. There’s a few other women pregnant, and Harper is excited that her baby will have some other young children around to eventually play with. It isn’t until the tea has cooled enough to sip that Harper looks expectantly at her and her curiosity gives way. 

“So? What’s going on with you and Murphy living together?”

“What do you mean?”

“Come on, Raven. You know what I mean.”

“Okay, he’s sleeping here, if that’s what you’re getting at.”

Harper sighs dramatically. “Well, _why_ is he sleeping here? Are you guys hooking up or something?”

“What? No! Damn, Harper, what the hell kind of question is that?”

“An honest one,” her friend laughs. “I mean, all of a sudden both of you were so casual about him sleeping here like it was no big deal, but to the rest of us it seems like it might be.”

Raven rolls her eyes. “You’ve got the wrong idea. He was sleeping in the _woods_. I found out, gave him a lecture about the cold weather that was coming, and convinced him he should stay here through the winter instead. That’s it.”

That’s not entirely the full story, but it doesn’t seem right to bring up Murphy’s refusal to sleep around the other single men. She doesn’t make a habit of announcing her own struggles either. They all have their baggage. 

Harper looks over her shoulder at the small sleeping alcove with it’s too-close beds, and she turns back to Raven with an eyebrow raised. “So you’re telling me both of you are sleeping _there_ , in that intimate little bump-out and nothing is going on? What would you have said if me and Monty had started bedding down that close, back in our Dropship days?”

The way Harper words it makes her feel self-conscious. “That was completely different. You guys liked each other, even back then.”

“And you’re telling me there’s no spark between you and Murphy? You can be honest, Raven. I’m not going to judge. I always thought maybe, if things were different, you two might have started something up on the Ring.”

It feels difficult to breathe, like she can’t suck in enough air because of what Harper’s suggesting. She wants to laugh it off, shake her head at her friend like she’s being silly to even suggest something going on between her and Murphy, but a laugh won’t come no matter how hard she tries. 

“We’re not like that,” she denies instead, getting to her feet to take the two mugs to the basin that she uses to wash out dishes. 

“Okay. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I’m sorry for bringing it up.”

Raven nods stiffly, though her back is to Harper. There’s a too-long moment of quiet, and then Harper mercifully changes the subject. 

* * *

She goes to bed that night feeling tense. After Harper’s visit, Raven had felt stressed-out and anxious for the rest of the day, and it wasn’t all due to the insinuations Harper was making about her and Murphy either. No, things had only gotten worse when Harper had been ready to leave. She’d moved to get out of the chair but had frozen half-way to her feet with a cry of pain. Raven had raced over to assist her, and Harper explained that she had started having hip pain - something about ligaments loosening, Raven hadn’t really paid close attention. She’d been far more concerned that something was wrong with the baby. But Harper had stood and rubbed at her hip for a while, cringing while she reassured Raven it would go away. And then she’d nonchalantly said something about her pain probably being worse than usual because of the bone marrow removal in Mt. Weather, and it was like ice water had been poured through Raven’s veins at the reminder. 

It was a lot of work, keeping those memories suppressed, and between that and the questions about what she was doing with Murphy, the rest of her day had been wasted since she couldn’t focus. She’d been distant at dinner with Clarke and Madi, though she’d tried to play it off, and when Murphy had come into the cabin she’d snapped at him twice before apologizing and saying she’d had a rough day. He’d nodded and made a crack about being used to her bitchiness by now, and it had lightened the mood for a little while, at least. 

But now she’s having trouble sleeping; every time she closes her eyes she can hear that drill, feel the absolute terror of those moments being strapped to the table even before the unbearable pain. Rolling to her back, she concentrates on taking deep breaths, matching them to the rhythmic inhales and exhales that Murphy takes in the bed close beside her. 

* * *

She’s gasping for air, tears streaming down her face and arms fighting when she wakes up, and it takes her longer than it should to realize that it’s only Murphy embracing her and not someone she needs to escape from. He’s sitting on the edge of her cot, speaking her name over and over, low and urgent, and the second she realizes where she is she relaxes her arms around his shoulders and slumps against him, drained. Her tears don’t stop, and neither does the trembling of her body as his hands make slow strokes up and down her back. Long minutes pass as she begins to calm, her heart slowing down along with her breathing. She leans back to wipe her eyes, and Murphy looks down at her, concern written all over his face. 

“You okay?”

Sniffing, she slowly nods. “That hasn’t happened for a while, sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry for. We all have them.”

“Yeah. I guess I thought I had conquered them or something though.”

His hands are so warm along her back. “I don’t know if we ever do. Just maybe they come and go. Did something happen today to trigger a memory? That’s what usually gets me, but not always.”

“Harper came to visit today. Mt. Weather came up and I spent most of the day feeling tense about it after. I probably should have expected a nightmare.”

His eyes narrow with realization. “You all got tortured there. For your bone marrow.”

Raven’s eyes stray down to her hip in response. She can’t see the scar beneath her pants, but she knows it’s there. “It was a long time ago.” 

It doesn’t feel that way though, not with the pain of it all so fresh in her mind. 

“Doesn’t matter. Thinking about it, dreaming about it, it can take you right back to it like it just happened.” 

It’s nice to be understood, though she wishes neither of them were this familiar with nightmares. His arms tighten briefly around her and she’s tempted to lay her cheek against his shoulder again, but instead they let her go when Murphy shifts away from her, getting up and taking two short strides to the chest at the end of his bed before returning, holding out a cup. 

“You want some water?”

“Thanks.” And she does want a drink, her throat sore, probably from moaning or shouting, but she knows she also feels less… certain of herself since Murphy is no longer holding her. It was easier to feel back in control with his arms keeping her steady. 

After drinking most of the water, she gives him the cup and he puts it back on the chest, sitting on the edge of his cot afterwards, facing her. 

“Think you can get back to sleep?”

She bites her lip, considering as she rests her head on her pillow and stretches out her legs. She feels exhausted, depleted from the nightmare and the tears, but worried about closing her eyes. He was right - she does feel like it all just happened again. 

Murphy hastens to reassure her. “I’ll wake you up if you have another nightmare. Look,” he lays down, pulling the covers over himself and reaches an arm between them. He has no trouble reaching her shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. “See, I don’t even have to get up. I’ll just throw my arm towards you and a few rough shakes ought to do it.”

The teasing actually helps. 

“Yeah. That ought to do it.” She rolls to face him so he can see that he’s made her smile. “Thanks, Murphy.”

She closes her eyes. 

* * *

It gets colder as the weeks continue to pass, and Murphy doesn’t stay out of the cabin as long during the day since it gets dark earlier too. He ends up working alongside her on occasion, and she thinks he starts to get used to people coming in and out of their cabin all day with various requests or trades to make or updates about how the buildings and water systems are going. He ends up turning into some kind of broker for her, making all sorts of deals that start to fill her shelves with a variety of stuff. Raven has to reign him in a few times, but even she has to admit she’s really happy to have a nicer blanket when he convinces a man whose wife can sew to sweeten the pot on the trade he wants to make. 

They have another group night out in late December to celebrate a new year right around the corner, eating dinner together at the town bar. It’s fun but freezing even with the multiple bonfires blazing. Everyone teases Harper because it’s starting to be noticeable that she’s pregnant under her coat, but Raven’s worried that she looks pale. Harper admits the morning sickness is still taking a toll, but she brushes them off and says that Abby is aware of it and that the pregnancy is going well, the baby due sometime in May. Monty jumps in then, telling everyone that they’ve asked Marcus to preside over a small wedding ceremony when the weather starts to turn in early spring, and everyone forgets about their cold hands and cheeks in order to extend the celebration further. 

The next day, Murphy heads out early even though it’s snowing. She’s not concerned initially, but he’s gone much later than usual, not yet back when Bellamy comes by to bring both of them a plate for dinner so they don’t have to trek out into the snow, which started coming down much harder by mid-afternoon. She tells Bellamy how long he’s been gone, but Bellamy says he isn’t worried so she tries not to be either. It doesn’t completely work. 

Murphy ambles through the door a few hours later when Raven is already in bed, sleepless as she thinks about all the terrible things that could have happened to him since she didn’t even have a way to know where he was headed. 

“That snow is really adding up outside! Probably going to have to clear quite a few paths in the village tomorrow.” There’s thick drifts of snow falling off his coat and boots as he strides to the backdoor, a gust of wind blowing in as he opens it. He returns a few moments later with another pile of logs for the fire to add to the ones that Raven has already collected near the fireplace. 

“What the fuck, Murphy!” Raven sits up in the bed, glaring at him. “You’ve been gone since this morning! I thought something bad had happened!”

He pauses in stacking the wood, grinning over his shoulder at her outburst. “Aw, were you worried about me?”

“Damn it, yes!” Raven is tempted to wipe the grin right off his face, but it’s too much trouble to get out from under the warm covers. “I didn’t even know which direction you had gone. And what if you really were in danger? You know if I pulled that crap out there alone, you’d be mad at me too.”

Murphy shrugs out of his jacket and gloves, hanging them up before walking over to the sleeping alcove. He sits on the top of his storage chest and leans down to tug off his boots before he turns to face her. The expression on his face is almost apologetic, and a little of her outrage starts to fade away when she sees that he's taking her seriously.

“Alright, yeah. I wouldn’t like it if you did that. So listen close. Do you remember where you were, out by the stream that day that asshole tried to touch you while you were sleeping?” He waits for her nod before he continues. “Good. Go west from there about a half-day’s trek and you’ll run into some rock formations at the base of the mountains. If you look carefully, you’ll find a couple of caves and deep crevices. I’ve got food and weapons stored in multiple places out there. Odds are good that’s often where you might find me if I go missing, okay?”

“God, you’ve got such a racket going now that you’ve taken over what I take in trade for my repairs, don’t you? How many knives have you negotiated for? Did you seriously go all that way today just to hide a new stash of weapons?”

She can’t keep the annoyance out of her tone. If he pushes her on it, she might admit she’s glad he’s taken over the task of working out trades since she probably took too little in return for her time anyway. Still, she doesn’t like that she spent most of the day with unease building in the back of her mind for hours while she waited for him to return. She was _worried_. 

A sly look crosses Murphy’s face at the accusation. “I mean, I could say I haven’t gotten a few sharp objects in return for you giving out some scrap materials or you showing someone how to make a pipe system out of reeds or bamboo or whatever the hell you’re using, but we both know I’d be lying.” He stands, nudging his boots to the side with his foot as he pulls his outer sweater over his head, draping it onto the chest before he starts unbuttoning his next layer. “But I did not go out there today to hide weapons. I went for this.”

He tosses a sack onto the end of her bed. She hadn’t noticed it when he came in but when she unties it, she looks up in surprise after she sees the contents. There’s apples, black walnuts and dried dandelion leaves inside. 

“You went out in a snow storm because you were hungry for something different?” She might shriek the question, just slightly, at the idea that he’d risked himself for food they didn’t really need. 

“As far as I know, there isn’t any reason to be concerned about the food supply yet,” Raven continues. “They aren’t allowing seconds, of course, but we’re not scraping the bottom of the barrel.” There had been a lot of stew, sure, but in her opinion, that was gourmet food compared to algae. 

“Nah, it’s not for me. Harper looked awful last night, and Monty said she’s sick during more than just the morning. Apparently the smell of meat keeps setting her off. Don’t tell him, but next time he comes over for a project, say you got this in a trade and you promised you’d keep it quiet so he won’t spread the word. That way you might get more.”

“Ugh,” she groans, as she knots the sack and suddenly throws it at him, aiming deliberately for his head. He has to drop his shirt on the floor to catch it. 

“What was that for?” He sounds indignant. 

She scowls and flops back onto her pillow. “Because I spent most of my evening wondering if you’d gotten lost in the snow or if you’d stepped in a hole and broken your ankle or some other kind of catastrophe, _that’s_ why! I even told Bellamy I was worried, for fuck’s sake! And now I can’t even be mad because you did it for a good reason!”

He laughs at her, the jackass. It’s infuriating. 

“Whatever,” she mumbles, rolling to face the wall. “Serves you right that I ate half the stew Bellamy brought over for you. If you want the rest of it, it’s covered on the table.”

Murphy only laughs harder.

* * *

The days pass, busy but nowhere near as suffocating as their time on the Ring. The fact that they're not _trapped_ anymore seems to make a difference for all of them, the sense of freedom being something to savor just like the ground under their feet and the scent of the frost on the air. 

Along with her nightmares about Mt. Weather, she’s been trying to stuff down the weird emotions Harper stirred up with her comments about Murphy and the relationship Raven has with him. But unlike the bad dreams, her feelings about Murphy are much tougher to bury, and the more time she spends in the tiny cabin with him, the more Harper’s questions nag at her. 

Relentlessly and on repeat.

* * *

January and February crawl by slowly, marked only by the increase in snowstorms. Hardly anyone is working on projects outside except for the regular sound of wood being chopped, so Raven has time on her hands while they’re stuck indoors. One afternoon when she’s endlessly pacing the main room of the cabin, desperate to turn her brain off, Murphy looks up from where he’s sprawled out on his cot, arms folded behind his head as he watches her. 

“Are you having fun?”

“Do I _look_ like I’m having fun, Murphy? I’m used to having my hands busy all day and I’m bored.”

He scoots down to the edge of his bed and opens the lid to his chest. “Go sit at the kitchen table. I’ve got something we can do.”

Curious, she obeys, and a few moments later he strides over, a smooth wooden board with a carved grid all over the surface in his hands, along with a small pouch. 

“You ever heard of _Go_?”

“No, what is it?”

“It’s a game, pretty old I think. There was a board in the Skybox, back on the Ark. I haven’t played for a long time, but I liked it. You’re supposed to use stones, but I haven’t found enough yet so I’ve got wooden discs from sticks and then I dyed the dark ones with the black walnut husks.”

“So what you’re saying is, you _made_ a game during some of those hours you spent in the woods. And you’re also saying that you’re only bringing it out now, after I’ve been going crazy for like a month already?”

Murphy shrugs, but there’s a grin on his face he can’t hide. “You weren’t desperate enough yet. Had to bide my time. Sort those wood pieces into light and dark. They’re supposed to be black and white and maybe this summer you can help me collect enough stones to replace them.”

She can see he did a good job on the board and discs as she starts to finger the round circles. Everything is smooth, and the difference in the shade of the pieces is obvious. 

“These pieces are nice. The lines are really straight on the board too. Is it like chess?” They had that on the Ring, at least. They found an old set that was missing a few pieces, but they’d made do. Raven’s pretty sure it’s at Harper and Monty’s cabin now. 

“It’s strategy, yeah. But it’s different.” He glances across the table at her. “Whoever wins gets bragging rights, as usual.”

“Works for me,” she smiles, and listens patiently while he explains the rules. 

She’s no longer bored. 

* * *

At the beginning of March, Monty invites them to carry their dinners over to his and Harper’s cabin since they want to discuss plans for their wedding ceremony, which they’re hoping to hold in mid-April if the weather is warm enough. Harper’s counting on spring flowers and that the baby won’t arrive early. 

They trudge through the snow and Murphy brings the _Go_ game along. He’s not the only one who brings something extra - Emori brings a date. A female date. Raven’s not actually surprised about it, though she does wonder if the evening is going to be awkward after she realizes what’s going on. To everyone’s credit, there are no issues and even Murphy seems to take it in stride. 

It’s a bit impressive, honestly, the way he handles the whole thing, and she makes a point of being particularly nice to him the whole visit because of it. Murphy seems to notice though, because he throws her a questioning glance when she adds ‘please’ to her request for more water when he gets up and makes the offer to bring the pitcher to anyone else. She ends up scowling at him when he teases her about suddenly having manners, and because they spend most of the meal bickering and then showing off the game, the night passes by quickly. 

Clarke asks Murphy if he’ll consider making another _Go_ board for her and Madi, and by the end of things, Murphy ends up with a few new trades and favors to be owed in exchange for his promise to make more games. At this rate she thinks he’ll have enough deals to call in to have a new cabin built for himself, but the thought doesn’t make her laugh so much as it makes her remember that he’ll probably be moving out when the warm weather arrives. The conclusion feels sobering, and her enthusiasm as she and the other women discuss what Harper wants to wear for the wedding is more reserved because of it. 

Eventually the night ends and everyone except the parents-to-be bundle up to head out into the snow, the temperature dropping by the hour. Harper fusses when she notices Raven doesn’t have a hat on, insisting that Raven borrow one of hers to get home in, but her protests are drowned out when Echo teases that Harper has the mothering gene down perfectly already. A soft hat is pushed onto her head and down over her ears whether she likes it or not, and when Madi and Murphy start a snowball fight a few seconds after walking out the door, she’s glad for Harper’s instincts as she and Echo dive towards the same bush in order to start retaliating. 

* * *

Quite a while later, she and Murphy track in what feels like heaps of snow from their clothes into the area inside their door, and after taking off her wet mittens, she hangs up her coat while Murphy heads out back for more firewood. She reaches up to take off the bedraggled hat but only succeeds in pulling her hair when it catches on something inside it. No matter how many gentle tugs she gives, the hat won’t come off unless she sacrifices a chunk of hair with it. Annoyed, she gives up and sits at the table to remove her boots, doing her best to be patient. She watches as Murphy stacks the wood and takes off his own outerwear, and once he drops his shoes by the door, she gets up and walks over to him, carefully avoiding the melting snow puddles on the floor. 

“Hey, can you help me get this hat off? It’s caught on my hair somehow and I think I’m all tangled.” 

Murphy leans in closer, his hands carefully lifting the knitted fabric as he inspects the damage. “Oh. There’s two buttons on the inside, like you can roll the bottom up so it won’t go so far over your ears. You’ve got knots around both of them.”

“Great,” Raven mutters. “Can you try to unwind my hair before we break out the knives and hack it off?”

“You never let me have any fun, Reyes,” he drawls, but she can feel his fingers on her scalp as he begins, and her eyes close after just a few moments. 

The soft touches feel good, soothing, and although it takes some time for Murphy to tease the strands loose, it’s over before she wants it to be when the hat is lifted off her head. Opening her eyes, she looks up at Murphy and he’s much closer than she’d realized, his gaze fixed on hers. It feels different all of a sudden, looking at him. Like she’s seeing something she hasn’t examined closely enough before, a piece that’s new. Whatever it is, it makes her feel strange, her stomach swirling and her pulse racing. It must affect her ability to react too, because she can’t think, and that’s the only explanation for why they’re both standing so still, frozen just inches from each other until his blue eyes are all she can see. It also has to explain why an instant later they both _do_ move, her chin tilting up and his tilting down until their lips meet in a very unexpected kiss. A kiss that neither of them stop for long minutes, caught up in the startling newness, and yes, the absolute ease of it, if she was capable of putting it into words. 

But she’s not capable of doing anything but kissing Murphy, even if she is uncertain who started it or if there had simply been a mutual urge that overtook them both at once. It’s so much sensation she’s overwhelmed, her hands curving around his shoulders and the heat of his palms on her hips, and then it continues, building and building as his thumb brushes her jaw and she learns the way his hair feels between her fingers. And then her foot moves partially into a cold, wet puddle of melted snow that soaks through her sock, and it’s like she’s jolted with awareness of a different kind. 

She steps backwards, further into the puddle as her hands fall away and her mouth burns and her head starts to ache with questions. Murphy doesn’t take his eyes off her and he looks almost calm, not flustered and unnerved like she is. But it doesn’t matter, not when she needs to get away. She presses her lips together to force away the tingle, manages to mumble something about going to change and then she strides past him in a hurry, wrenching the curtain to their sleeping alcove closed behind her before she collapses onto her cot, her head falling into her hands as she tries to control her breathing. 

_What the hell had they just done?_

* * *

She hears him come to bed almost an hour later, but she faces the wall and lets him assume she’s asleep. 

* * *

They don’t talk about it when they wake up. And they don’t talk about it during the day or in the evening either. 

Raven thinks of practically nothing else. 

* * *

Pretending the kiss didn’t happen seems to be the approach they’re both taking, and in the weeks until Harper and Monty’s wedding, their routine doesn’t change much and the time seems to pass relatively quickly. The weather does get warmer, though they end up moving the date by a few days in order to take advantage of the wild forsythia bushes that are in sunny bloom. 

The day of the wedding shines bright and clear, but Raven continues to feel on edge, unsettled, a feeling that has become familiar to her after she and Murphy crossed a line with their friendship. She still isn’t sure what it all means. Even though she’s been scrutinizing her feelings about it like one of her mechanical problems she was determined to fix. 

It’s not that they were acting distant from each other so much as it was obvious there was an elephant in the room they were ignoring, and she wasn’t sure how much longer they were going to last without addressing it. Part of her wanted to be her normal confrontational self and force a conversation, but if she did that, she needed to know what she was going to say. And she was nowhere close to it. 

Determined to put it out of her head for the day so she can focus on Harper and Monty, Raven stretches her legs out in front of her and waves the kinks out of her arms. She’s been twisting forsythia branches into flower crowns for the ladies Harper wanted to honor and weaving long pieces of them into an arch with Emori and Echo all morning, and finally the ‘done’ pile is bigger than the ‘to do’ one. They’d found a small clearing in the woods not far away from the cluster of houses, and most of the guys had been tasked with setting up some log stools and benches for seating while the women took care of the decorations. Raven had teased Harper that it was a little sexist, but none of them had wanted to carry the logs except Madi, so they sent her off with the men and had a fine time gossiping on their own while Harper finished the last details on a pretty dress she’d pieced together for herself. 

By late afternoon everything was ready for the ceremony, and it looked even better than Raven had been picturing. There was a center aisle with benches on either side, and pale petals of some early spring flowers were sprinkled on the grass outlining where the bride and groom would stand to say their vows, right in front of the forsythia arch. She had a feeling the consensus in the village would be to leave the benches and the foundations of the arch for anyone else who might wish to use them in the future, and it was a nice thought, imagining that they were all finding another way to make this feel like their place. Their _home_.

Monty and Harper had decided they would invite anyone who wanted to come, since it was the first wedding ceremony held in Shallow Valley since they’d all settled there, and people were steadily streaming through the trees to find a seat. Thankfully Bellamy, Miller, Octavia, Madi and Murphy save them some spots at the front, and Raven, Emori, Echo and Clarke rush in just before things start since they were giving some last-minute attention to the bride. She ends up squished between Octavia and Murphy, and for the first time since they kissed she feels like they really connect when he turns his head and smiles at her as she sits down. 

“In a way, all the work we had to do today is your fault,” he accuses, but she can tell by his tone he’s got a joke lingering in there somewhere. 

“And what makes you say that?”

“If you hadn’t figured out a way to get us off the Ring, and safely too, this day would have never happened. Looks to me like you’re the queen of doing the impossible, so I guess that flower crown on your head suits you.”

Her throat feels tight at the compliment and the desire to thank him for saying it, but she can’t find the words. Everybody on the Ring had been thrilled she solved the endless problems, she knew that. Just like she knew they were all grateful for her bringing them back to Earth. But this time Murphy’s praise affects her differently, more personally. She can’t linger on the moment though, and not on his steady blue gaze either, not when Marcus Kane clears his throat to begin to speak, and a few minutes later Harper appears at the end of the aisle.

She’s due to give birth any day now but it only adds to the beautiful glow that surrounds her, and even Raven finds herself getting misty-eyed as Harper and Monty smile at each other. The ceremony is lovely, and the image of the newlyweds walking back up the aisle as so many well-wishers wave long, colorful scraps of fabric tied to sticks - all Harper’s idea - is one that will stay in Raven’s memory always. 

* * *

They have a party after, of course. Not so different from their usual nights at the town bar, but it feels more special with the flowers around, and Madi and some of the other teen girls grabbed all the fluttery fabric sticks and placed them on tables and in pots to make things even more festive. There’s music, and plenty of moonshine, though Raven’s careful this time not to overdo it. Some of the younger crowd are trying to teach each other dance steps, and she watches, laughing, with Clarke and Octavia from one of the nearby tables. Clarke’s enjoyment turns more serious when Aden walks over to Madi and the two of them drift a little bit away from the group, though, and Octavia smirks and says something about how the boy has always been quick. Raven giggles, tipsy but definitely not drunk, and tells them both she’s going back to her cabin to get her jacket and will return soon. 

She gets just out of sight of the bonfires when a hand wraps over her arm and tugs her towards the trees, her breath leaving her in a startled gasp as she whirls around to see who it is. 

“What the hell, Murphy! Are you _trying_ to scare me?”

He shakes his head, his eyes bright in the starlight. “Should’ve reached for your knife, if you weren’t sure it was me.” His words would normally incite an argument within her, but she’s feeling relaxed from the happy day and the moonshine, so she just leans back against the scaly bark of a tree and crosses her arms. 

“Was there a reason you wanted to harass me, or should I just go get my jacket like I planned?”

“I think we should talk about when you kissed me.” 

Her eyes widen, both in shock that he’s bringing it up and because of the way he puts the responsibility on her. “I think you mean how _you_ kissed _me_.”

Murphy lifts one shoulder in a casual shrug, inexplicably closer than he was just a moment ago. “Either way, we both seemed like willing participants, so I’m thinking we should discuss it.” 

If she takes too deep of a breath, her breasts are going to brush against his chest, he’s that close, and it’s so much tougher to think of a response when she’s reminded of exactly what happened the last time they were in such proximity to one another. 

“We got caught up in a moment,” Raven says weakly. “We- we weren’t thinking.”

“Oh? Is that what happened?” He cocks his head at her like he’s intrigued by her answer. She feels much warmer than she did a few minutes ago. 

“Yeah. Wasn’t it?”

“I think we felt like kissing each other, so we did. So really the only question is whether we want to do it again.”

“You think that’s the only question?” Raven scoffs, annoyed that he makes it sound so easy. “Because I can think of at least thir-”

The rest of her sentence gets cut off when Murphy seizes her mouth in another kiss, this one more forceful than their first. She should stop him, demand they talk about this like they really should, but her body has other ideas, especially when he crowds her against the tree and his fingers sneak below the hem of her shirt to graze against the skin of her stomach. 

Eventually his lips trail down across her cheek, the rough texture of his beard scraping along her jaw in a way that makes her shiver, and his voice is close to her ear when he speaks, gruff and insistent. 

“We can make this simple, if we want it to be.”

Maybe he’s right. Maybe all her questions don’t matter if she wants this and he wants this and it makes them both happy. Because he _does_ make her happy. For years now she could always count on him to be there for her even when she was miserable or angry or frustrated or determined to pick a fight. And he made her smile like no one else. She already knew the idea of him moving out of her cabin made her feel awful and lonely because she wants him to stay. Harper had been right when she'd said it - there was a spark between them. Maybe there always had been. And the kissing...yeah, that was really working for her too. 

Maybe it _was_ easy, the more she thought about it. 

“I suppose it’s worth a try,” she murmurs, the sound of his low chuckle satisfying something deep inside her as her lips find his again. 

Maybe there could be more to life than just surviving. For both of them. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you'll consider letting me know what you thought. I won't promise that I'll be doing this long term, and I already have other prompts I'm working on, but if you'd like to support BLM, maybe I'll write a fic for you, too. 
> 
> https://easilydistractedbyfanfic.tumblr.com/post/620392423062978560/accepting-murven-fic-prompts-for-a-cause


End file.
